*sigh* (like exhausted sigh, not swoony-stupid sigh)
Oye. So, William is great, as I've mentioned. He's fun, and I know he considers me his best friend... but sometimes he is just so goddamn pessimistic... like, maybe it's almost just realistic, but still... at least when it comes to relationships, one should always try to be optimistic, or at the very least, pretennnnnnnd to be for the other person's sake... well, I mean, don't lie to them, though. Don't say you expect to marry them someday if they're really just a booty call. lol. (That's never happened to me, don't worry)
Like, ok, I can see us being pretty likely to break up after graduation, but there's a chance we wont, and I wouldn't say it's microscopic... just small... like corey casey. I like to focus on that chance, though, and William... well... is just dodgy around the whole subject, and from what I gather, doesn't think we'll even remain friends... which I think is ridiculous. As I told him... I will make him stay friends with me if I have to. I don't care if he goes to college on the damn moon. We talk every single day. When we are in the same city, we see each other every single day (with a few exceptions obviously), and we have yet to get truly sick of each other...
Anyway, back to the us after graduation thing. Last night I kind of thought through what it would be like if, when he went to grad school, I... followed, and got a job in the town his school was in. He could get his degree, I could pay the bills. As a strictly business proposition, it would be fantastic for him. He could go to school without having to worry about getting a job, so he could focus on his studies. On another plus side, he gets to go to a new city with a (girl)friend so it's an easier transition, because he wouldn't know no one. I'd be totally willing to do house chores and such... and we'd still be together, even if it wasn't forever. I guarantee we'd be fine living together. I like new places, new people, etc. I can transfer to any Walmart in the world if I request, so I'd have a job while I search for a career. I don't know... I mean, I was just thinking what It'd be like. I'd certainly enjoy it. I thought about mentioning it while we were on the phone tonight, but figured it'd be better to just wait and see how things pan out the next couple of years... I think... if we're still together, when he actually starts applying and making plans, I might offer the idea, but.... I don't know... He's such a mystery. I never know how he feels about things, or what he thinks about our relationship. I can read him like a book... except when it comes to what "us" means to him. Because, I'm sure, if the opportunity presented itself, I could spend the rest of my life with him, and I know that according to what he says, he doesn't see the point in dating someone you can't see that potential with, but sometimes I wonder... but maybe it's just because that's how he talks about everything: Pessimistically. I dunno.
I love him so much.
and for all I know... he just less-than-three's me.
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